Souvenirs d’antan

Le voilà qui se fond dans son instrument. Les doigts pianotent à folle allure, ou à intervalles irréguliers qui ne cessent de surprendre l’auditeur dans la justesse de leurs distances. Les noires et les blanches s’entrechoquent avec ferveur. Certaines se marient quelques instants pour mieux repartir, tandis que d’autres se heurtent avec véhémence, produisant un choc sonore de couleurs éclatantes. Le chemin se trace au fur et à mesure que les mesures s’alignent, et sans démesure, s’envolent de la partition invisible.

Je n’avais jamais entendu cette parade. Cette course au plus bel enchaînement. Tantôt irrévérencieux, tantôt sage, il se transforme au gré des mains dansantes. Les sons qui sortent du piano m’enchantent. Ils tournent autour de moi avant de se fracasser contre mes tympans. Je peux les voir. Au bout de mes doigts, cette sensation. La texture de chaque touche appuyée apparaît sous la pulpe un peu rugueuse. Et disparaît aussitôt que la note ait fini de retentir. Je reconnais chacune d’entre elles. Je sais exactement laquelle se dérobe sous mes doigts. Laquelle sera frappée ensuite. Et mes mains s’animent seule. La mémoire d’un don d’avant. La mémoire de ce toucher à la fois familier, et si peu rencontré. La mémoire d’un vieil ami dont on ne se souvient que par petits détails. Un éclat de lumière dans l’œil droit. La douceur de la peau recouvrant son épaule. L’odeur de ses cheveux en matinée. Un instant furtif d’amitié au bord de la Seine. Une balade autour des marchés. Cette montre qu’il ne quittait jamais.

La musique emporte toute raison. Mon corps semble se souvenir mieux que mon esprit. Quelque chose en moi reprend vie. Une douce mélancolie me berce. Je ferme les yeux, et il n’y a plus que ce son magique vibrant dans mes os, et la sensation des touches tant aimées sous les doigts. Comme un regret trop fort qu’on veut enfouir, j’essaie de ravaler l’océan aux portes de mes paupières lourdes. Une goutte s’échappe. Bienheureuse de parcourir enfin le sillon qui se trace le long de ma joue. Elle danse, elle aussi.

Est-ce de la tristesse ? De la joie ?

Peu importe.

Je me laisse emporter par les sensations, et les souvenirs d’antan me font rêver de ces journées et de ces nuits lointaines où mes doigts étaient mes touches.

Inspiré grâce à Glenn Gould.


The power of thoughts.

[My little brother ❤ .

If the wood is a thought, the river is Life answering to it.

Make good waves with good wood !]

Last week, I went to my favourite bookstore in Paris. Well, it’s not like it was a great piece of news, because almost everytime I go to Paris, I take a look at the new arrival of books in this shop. It’s between the Cathedrale and Saint Michel, and I love this area of the city. There is something in the air (don’t say « pollution », really, please…), that makes me feel relax. I start from the town hall, then I pass by Notre-Dame, enter in the bookshop, go out of it a hour later, walk by the Seine, lose myself in the little streets, find pretty little art galleries, and take the subway at the Luxembourg park if I’m lost enough to arrive there. I can spend a whole afternoon just walking and exploring the town. The more I know it, Paris seems to be bigger and bigger. That’s quite convenient as I don’t like it when I can’t discover places anymore. I think I have time until I’ve seen every street in Paris !

So, I was talking about that bookstore I love. It’s an « esoteric » one, with a few themes as Angels, Tarot, Wicca, Meditation, Astrology, Channelling, and so on, but there are a lot of personal development books. You can find what you need to read to become more confident, more persuasive, more « powerful »… I usually pick up some meditation stuffs and some of these last ones. The book I bought the other week is written by an american woman (I’ll remember her name and put it here, don’t cry !). Her writing skills are quite impressive ! In fact, the thing is that she doesn’t write that well, but that when you read it, you’re immediately in a sort of auto-hypnosis state. You don’t really think about what you’re reading, and the substance doesn’t reach your brain, but when you close the book for any reason, you realize something has changed in you. This book doesn’t speak to you, but to something that is even deeper than your thoughts. And, actually, it talks about the power of thoughts. I’ll give you a coarse description, but nevertheless an acurate one : It says that whatever you think and say will one day or another become real. So, if you think you’re not capable of something, or don’t deserve any good event, what will happen is that you will unconsciously stop yourself, and ruin all your chances to earn or win anything ! The great news is that the contrary is also right : if you think you can do it, and that you deserve that something good happens to you, it will ! People who are rich, successful, live in a real Abundance of everything have this richness, successfulness, abundance in their mind all the time.

She says that if you say some affirmations with conviction and faith, these ones will be effective. « I have a great luck today ! » « Something good will happen to me today, in a suprising way ! ». Those are affirmations that will give you the happiness you need to see this luck coming. Well, for the worst, if (a big « IF ») nothing happens, at least, you had a big smile on your face all day long, and that, my dear, makes you feel better, and it’s something very precious ! As far as I’m concerned, since I began to read this book, I feel more comfortable in my everyday life, I am less anxious, and my confidence pleased the people I met these last days ! A lot of surprising good, little and big, things happened in a few days, and I couldn’t hope for more for Easter ! Work, inspiration, friendship, personal development, every side of my life has been touched by my confidence in it.

In fact, I discovered the power of thoughts a few years ago. I was a little shy teenager who didn’t like herself. Especially her body. I was « too fat, my skin was awful, I had terrible legs and my face was sooo unpretty ! » And, one day, I really don’t know what happened, what came to my mind, but I remember I started to look at me in the mirror, and just, smile at me. Days passed, and I started to say to myself « I’m pretty ! » « Look at this gorgeous face ! » « You’re beautiful, b*tch ! » « I’m so happy to have this wonderful body ! ». I really looked at my body parts with a new judgement in mind. And, I guessed I believed me. I put a lot of efforts in that, and every year, I see a difference in my relationship with people and myself. This year, I took even more confidence. Whereas in middleschool, I thought I was ugly and the boys didn’t pay attention to me, or only made jokes on me, now, 6 years later, I never heard so many people saying I’m pretty, or giving me their number, I never talked so easily and confidently to anyone, I hesitate so much less talking to strangers, asking someone my way or help, and even ask if they need some. I’ve come a long way since middleschool, and I’m proud of myself. I still have a lot to improve. I still have this shy girl in me, but I work really hard not to be limited by her. I make my best to become the person I want to be. And the more I think positively, the more good things come to me.

Think positive, positive people are attracted by positive people !

This Easter week-end was so good, I have a lot of Love to spread ! Take it and give it to everyone you know ! \o/

Love to everyone, even YOU. ❤